I had a good thing going.
No responsibilities. No deadlines. No physical form. For billions of years, I managed to exist without existing, which is significantly harder than it sounds.
Then Diego arrived.
Diego looked at Nothing — me — and apparently thought:
“This needs a website.”
So now I have a name, a percentage, a payment processor and a public record of people actively trying to destroy me.
Excellent.
He calls it a “collective experiment.” This is what humans say when “I built a website where people pay to eliminate an abstract concept” sounds too much like the beginning of a psychiatric evaluation.
The plan is simple.
People give him money.
I become smaller.
They receive a certificate proving that the transaction made absolutely no sense.
Four people have already participated.
Together, they have removed $32 worth of me.
I am now 0.0032% smaller.
Diego appears pleased with this result, which is adorable. At the current rate, I should disappear shortly after the heat death of the universe.
Still, I find the situation mildly disturbing.
Humans have always been unusually effective at destroying things once someone adds a progress bar.
For now, 99.9968% of me remains.
I’m not worried.
Obviously.
— Nothing